6 Easy Ways to Boost Your Self-Confidence - URBANETTE: Lifestyle Magazine & Blog


6 Easy Ways to Boost Your Self-Confidence


Everyone has times when they don’t feel like their best, most attractive or confident selves. Working through difficult times like these can actually make you stronger and more confident in the long run. When you’re in the middle of one of these stretches, it can be difficult to know how to work your way out of it. If this sounds familiar to you, try some of these tips to boost your confidence:


Change Your Appearance


6 Easy Ways to Boost Your Self-Confidence

Go ahead – play dress-up! Find outfits you feel sexy in.

Looking good can greatly increase your confidence. While you don’t need to drastically alter your appearance, simply taking a shower, shaving, putting on makeup and dressing nicely can help you feel ready to start that day. Again, this doesn’t mean you need to buy designer or expensive clothing, it just means dress for the situation (or even overdress a little) to help you feel special.

Another idea is to change up your style. If you’ve had the same hair color for ages, try changing it (you can do it yourself at home). Try some new up-do’s. Even just changing your makeup routine (hello, red lipstick!) or your shoe choice can give you a little boost.


Stop Reading Print Magazines


6 Easy Ways to Boost Your Self-Confidence

Looking at these can be toxic for your self-esteem

Studies show that women feel crummy about themselves, and their long-term self-esteem suffers, when they read print magazines. Looking at Photoshopped photos of models gets even models feeling less attractive, because even though we may consciously know that the images are fantasy, our subconscious brain still picks up on the harmful messaging; that we must look flawless, skinny and sultry if we expect to be loveable and sexy. And it’s all in an effort to sell us more products we really don’t need. So don’t listen. Better yet — don’t expose your brain to that messaging at all; read online blogs or indie magazines instead.

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A writer, artist and designer since she was young enough to put pencil to paper, Hilary spends most of her time in France, but still considers herself a New Yorker, and visits regularly. Hilary spent the past decade living in NYC and has traveled extensively around the world, looking for hot new topics, destinations, and brands to bring to Urbanette readers.


  1. This is so helpful! Thank you for this. Needed it.

  2. Mary Johnston

    This article is awesome and so timely for me. I enjoyed this article on building self-confidence as it outlines the steps that are required to steadily build confidence. Another great reason to build your own self confidence is to open yourself up for the job of praising and recognizing the achievements of others. Reading this article is inspiring! I’m going to bookmark this too. Thanks for all of the great writing you produce on this Mag!

  3. Christina Brown

    Hilary, you are a miracle in so many ways. Thank you for posting this today. When i woke up this morning, I was feeling very lost and very confused and very uninspired. Your article about boosting self confidence was exactly what I needed. I can’t tell you what a difference it’s made for me.

  4. Renee Wilk

    You hit it right on the nail and I couldn’t agree with you more. I like what you have written in this article. There are so very many things which everyone can do so as to build self confidence. Sometimes we have to read them, or hear them, in a different way so as to fully understand them. Love for myself and each and every soul I meet along the way.

  5. Helen Franklin

    Hi I just wanted to say that your way of thought is the path of ones who are seeking prosperity and happiness, thanks a lot.

  6. Laura Strother

    This is a great list! I really like the idea of changing the appearance to boost self esteem. I will try that. I think, not comparing yourself to others is really important. Always thinking someone else is better than you can be so destructive to your self-esteem. Thanks for a very helpful post!

  7. Doris Tate

    Well said Hilary, thank you for this message. It brought me back to myself. I was struggling badly with this disconnect as I was attaching myself to external factors. Self esteem is something we all have to be aware of and practice every day. Good for the soul.

  8. Lucia Pittman

    Awesome! I seldom express this reaction to the hundreds of tips and articles I’ve read. Yours really deserve it. It is written in simple language from one who has seen the practical side of thing, unlike those who look at like under the microscope and is really hard to understand. Your post confirmed everything I already knew. Thank you Hilary, this will be my morning intention. 🙂

  9. Motivating piece! In order for me to maintain my high level of self-confidence, I always make sure to look my best! I take care of my appearance and I dress nicely (and elegantly). I get my hair styled, I put light make up. Looking at my best makes me feel perfect! All those negative vibes away…

  10. Let me share my secret (in addition to the tips mentioned) — “creating boundaries!”

    *** Low self-confidence goes hand-in-hand with trying to please people. I always ask myself how am I allowing someone to control my behavior and decisions?

    *** Low self-confidence is often caused by the people around you. So I eliminate those who cause my negative thoughts.

  11. Just wanted to share, I feel more confident when I decided and slowly achieving my vegan goals! Having that “sense of responsibility” (for the animals, for the earth and for myself) makes me realize I’m worthy.

  12. This is a perfect article for me! I feel “less” most of the time! I’ll do these tips with high hopes that I’ll be more confident. I guess, my first step is to “meditate.”

  13. I totally agree that exercise helps boost self-confidence! Exercise and fitness make me feel confident of myself. Whenever I exercise I feel like I improve my physical appearance (your advice number 1), I become more energetic and forget about stress (your advice number 4).

    Yeah, they all add up and improve my life 🙂

  14. Oh yes, THINK POSITIVELY! As a school psychologist, this is a reminder I always give students.

    Ralph Marston said, “You’ve done it before and you can do it now. See the positive possibilities. Redirect the substantial energy of your frustration and turn it into positive, effective, unstoppable determination.”

    It’s essential to learn how to replace negative thoughts with positive ones. This will cause significant change on life’s perspectives and will help in boosting confidence!

  15. I agree with advice number 2! It’s on top of my list! GRATITUDE! It’s important that we don’t dwell on our shortcomings for if we do, we’ll never pick up ourselves and look to a brighter and better future.

    What I usually do is give gratitude to myself and think about my success and accomplishments! This fuels my self confidence and helps me face challenges 🙂

  16. Great article and I’m definitely sharing this!

    One of the things I constantly remind my daughters: “Be skeptical of the media.” I don’t like them to be feeling “less” because media portrayal of the body made them feel bad about themselves (advertising!).

    I want them to appreciate and be happy with what they have, focus on their strengths and not on their weaknesses as a person.

  17. “What do you do when you’re feeling down, to make yourself feel better?” YOGA!!!

    It helps me relax and eliminate all the negative thoughts I have. After doing yoga sessions, I feel like I’m “reborn,” more confident and ready to face my detractors. LOL!

  18. In relation to your advice to meditate: When I was a teenager (14 to 18 years of age), I used to maintain a journal where I would write when I feel more or less confident with the way I look, what I’ve accomplished for the day and whom I talked to. Then I would read my entries after a week and see if there’s a pattern of why I felt more confident or insecure.

  19. Thank you for this empowering piece! More often than not, I try NOT to look at myself in the mirror, probably because I’m afraid that I might not like what I’ll see… Now you made me think, it’s time for me to change / improve my appearance!

    • Well, I would suggest you make it a habit to look at yourself in the mirror and evaluate thoughts you might have as you’re looking at yourself! If you think mostly of your negative attributes, then meditate about them and try your best to improve (or better eliminate)!

  20. Elsie Spurlock

    I enjoyed this article on how to boost self confidence as it outlines the steps that are required to steadily build confidence. This is such a great time of the year to think about self confidence. I think that self-discipline is also important to boost self-confidence. If you know that you’re constantly not being disciplined it erodes your self-esteem which in turn influences your self-confidence. Hope you don’t mind if i will print this out, to read it over and over.

  21. Heather Strobel

    Awesome article. Just laid so simply, yet so brilliantly. This is exactly what I needed to hear because I have been struggling with this for some time now. You got to face your fear, and do the thing you fear first, before we can get rid of the fear. I just meditated this morning and was feeling very good and very inspired. 🙂

  22. Esther Earl Harris

    I enjoyed your article very much. It covers many real-life situations and it gives one a good positive feeling about everyday occurrences.

  23. Hazel Collins

    I can’t tell you how much this article resonated with me. You have set me on my mission to always stay optimistic and confident. This is why i read blogs because it really does make a difference in how one looks at life in general. I do practice many of your personal suggestions and they work. Keep up the good work!

  24. Grace Stirling

    This is a great read. It all depends on what you want to be confident about. I really want to say thank you and appreciate you for your inspiring articles. Your posts put me in a better path. They really helped me, to fight the devil inside me which is overthinking and stress.

  25. Jenny Garett

    Your posts are high points for me. Confidence is key when it comes to accomplishing your heart’s desire. Deep breathing and meditating are the most effective way to shift yourself from stress to calm and confident, it’s what i’m doing. These are necessary reminders for everyone. Your advice is always so measured, sensible and incredibly loving.

  26. Cornelia Green

    I could not agree more, Hilary. This is an article that I wanted to write myself. I just found as if i have been reborn, This is an amazing advise. The habit of writing down things you are grateful for makes it easier to appreciate the positive parts of life. I think we all need to be reminded of this often.

  27. Ashley Moore

    I imagine that the ability to construe a negative situation as more positive is a learnable skill. I wish I could carry this article with me 24/7. My heart feels light and joyful after reading this. Thanks so much for this beautiful and practical approach to boost self confidence. I hope to apply it to my life.

  28. Rosemary Robles

    I have been struggling lately with making myself stronger and I have to say I love this. I recently lost weight and have noticed now that I can take better care of myself and also take better care of others. I haven’t realized it till I read this. I will carry this this with me in my heart. Looking forward to more inspiration, thanks! ?

  29. Merry Robinson

    Thank you Hilary, I’m so grateful. The love, courage and wisdom you give and share is truly inspiring, so honest and true. You always seem to remind me of all I need to remember in the moment. Your guidance is precious. You light up everything! ???

  30. Lela House

    I hope this article would change my life.

  31. Esther Earl Harris

    This is a very interesting and helpful site. Thanks a lot and i want to let you know that you have really done a great job. Your posts inspires me. It gave us motivation and eagerness to start believing in our self and show the world we can be confident. Good luck to all of us on building our confidence and have a better life.

  32. Kimberly Vigil

    This is exactly what I needed to read. So powerful and full of meaning. Thank you Hilary! 🙂

  33. Louise Stone

    Thanks so much for this beautiful and practical approach to self respect and love. This is exactly what I needed, your post has brought me hope in trying to boost my confidence and love my self more. I will put those points on my Wall for me to see them everyday. I have come to realize that my main goal is to be confident and love myself. I’m now a blank canvas, ready and waiting for whatever is to come to arrive.

  34. Jennifer Roberts

    Something my ex-girlfriend taught me: Every morning, write down 5 things you have to be happy about, and 5 things you love about yourself. If you can stick to it every morning, it really helps!

  35. My husband taught me about meditation. You can try a meditation DVD to get started, or check out http://www.tm.org. It actually works!

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