Men Answer Your Questions About Love - URBANETTE: Lifestyle Magazine & Blog


Men Answer Your Questions About Love

Is your man in love? Will he fall for you? Men answer: How to tell.


Michael, 37, a restaurant owner in North Carolina, says he’s cautious about expressing himself early on — not because he’s complacent or wants to play games or wants to make the woman squirm like a mouse in a cat’s mouth. He holds back because he’s waiting to get the signal that it’s okay to press the accelerator. “I love to hear that I’m her dream come true, or some version of that, if that’s the case,” he says. “I need a little praise and attention, just as much as she needs it from me. That’s the sign I need. Then, I know I can give her what she needs.”

What men really want when it comes to love is your assurance — your permission, really — that it’s okay to let the butterflies out of the cage.

Chris, 29, a recently married public defender, agrees. “Men need to be told that they’re wanted,” he says. “Women forget that if they like a nice guy, that the nice guy might be too nervous to tell them what he feels.” And then he added this interesting insight: “Women need to be more open to being hurt the way guys are every day.” Hold on a second. Guys are hurt more often than women?

Men Answer Your Questions About Love

Think about it: In the romance game, it’s usually the man who makes the first move (usually after you’ve dropped him countless hints waiting for him to finally pick up on them). But in doing so, men open themselves up to more rejection than a telemarketing trainee. And believe me, even George Clooney has a psychic master list of turn-downs that he still winces over from time to time.

So once a man has crossed that first barrier — okay, you like him, it’s safe — he’s reluctant to cross the next. Like monkeys in a lab, we’ve been shocked plenty of times before, and if we’re in a safe place with you, we’re happy simply to stay there. So it’s a delicate balance — a woman needs to signal that it’s okay for him to take the next step, without making him feel as if he’s being pushed toward it. Let him know that you feel there’s something really special between you. Let him know it’s okay if he lets himself feel that, too. But proceed cautiously — there’s danger ahead, as you’ll see.

We asked the most insightful men we know to answer our readers questions about, well, men. Here’s what they said:

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Sarah enlightens us on a daily basis with the newest trends as (and often before) they transpire. She is the consummate globe trotter. Having traveled to over 70 countries, she earns her living writing, blogging and modeling while on the road. In her spare time she gets manicures, suntans on yachts in Greece, shops for even more shoes, and lives in the limelight. She loves photography, elephants, sailboats, bangles and ballet flats.

Reader Discussion: 80 Comments

  1. I believe men need more understanding when it comes to matters of the heart. They do not speak what they feel which usually cause miscommunication.

  2. Thanks for writing, Sarah! Men and women need to meet halfway if they want to succeed in love!

  3. Men are completely different from us, women. And it’s essential that if you love your man, you need to understand him and make sure he knows you do.

  4. Jamie Wurst

    I’ve observed that often times falling in love leaves a man completely vulnerable which is somehow frightening him…

  5. Alta Johnson

    Oh love! Sometimes, I find it hard to communicate and compromise with my man.

  6. Laverne Pollard

    I know for a fact that relationships need a LOT of effort but most of the time, it’s not easy to figure out where I should be directing that effort. This article is extremely helpful!

  7. Jennifer Baker

    Great article, Sarah! Men are “seen” less emotional and I find it fantastic you’re able to come up with an interesting piece like this 👌

    • Deanna Hurt

      Hmmm… very interesting!

  8. Jennifer Baker

    Girls, in general, are curious creatures, and guys are the biggest mystery. Thanks for unfolding the mystery 😉

  9. Janice Way

    Thank you! This truly is enlightening. Questions I’ve been wanting to ask my man are answered. This will wipe away my insecurities!

  10. Loretta Alexander

    I can imagine how lucky their partners are. Claiming that they finally found their soulmate is very sweet. I hope my boyfriend thinks of me that way. Lol

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