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How to Spot and Trap a Lumbersexual

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There are two kinds of lumbersexuals, the fake kind and the sexy kind. Here’s how to spot the real ones, weed out the hipsters, and get over the fact that you’ve fallen for a beard-sporting, flannel-loving, Army boot-wearing man (who also may wear faux glasses and a droopy beanie that your dad makes fun of because hey, nobody is perfect).

How to Spot and Trap a Lumbersexual

Lumbersexuals are So. Hot. Right. Now.

Best Places to Find a Lumbersexual

Rock climbing gyms, any kind of racetrack, live music venues, Frisbee golf courses, the lake, the river, the hardware store — this is where you find real lumbersexuals. They are at bars, too (but then again, so are the lumbering not-so-sexuals).

How to Spot and Trap a Lumbersexual

Celebrity men are adopting the sexy lumbersexual look – in droves!

How to Avoid the Lumbering Not-So-Sexuals

Are his pants so tight that his thigh gap is wider than yours? Is he wearing Tom’s? Drinking a hard cider? This lumbering not-so-sexual may own a lot of plaid and have poor grooming habits, but odds are, he doesn’t know how to do many of the things that make real lumbersexuals so intoxicating. The allure of the lumbersexual is a manliness with an edge of fashionability, right? Well, consider this a guy a designer knockoff and beware!

How to Deal with His Fake Glasses

Fake glasses? That serve no medical purpose whatsoever? What is next, lumbersexuals? A plastic ax? What if we put a little fake bird on your shoulder like the kind my aunt gets from craft stores?

How to Spot and Trap a LumbersexualWe may hate on the faux rims fad but dangit, at least this guy has some guts. It’s kinda refreshing to meet a guy who is rugged and still likes to accessorize, right? And really, fake glasses are a ridiculous thing in concept, but we lie about fake eyelashes and summer highlights, so why shouldn’t men have their little secrets, too?

Still not feeling it? If you really hate them, you could just ‘accidentally’ squish them while packing his CamelBak for a surprise day hike..whoops! He can always get another $10 pair, but in the meantime tell him how hot he looks without them.

How to Deal with His Droopy Beanie

We all know this look. The hottest guy in the room sporting a beanie that looks like a deflated balloon taped to the back of his head. Is it just me, or is a beanie only hot when it looks like he would snowboard in it? The lumbersexual is all about gettin’ things done, using tools and being efficient. So an emo beanie just doesn’t cut it. Get him something structured, strong and knitted, with ear flaps or faux fur or leather and buckle detail. His desire to wear cheeky accessories will take over and break him from his sad droopy beanie habit.

How to Spot and Trap a Lumbersexual

All Flannel, All the Time

Over the last few years, we’ve all become experts at spotting a flannel from across the room in a sea of no-effort T-shirts. It’s a beacon of hope that there are still manly men out there who can build you a house AND help you decorate it, too (or at least be willing to go over the Pinterest board).

The increasing population of smart, dare-we-say sophisticated lumbersexuals is a pretty encouraging development. And the fashion world is even taking notice. The Guardian calls the trend “faux-hobo” and boasts the practicality of the style. That’s right. It’s finally fashionable to be practical. Oh wait, it always was — for men, anyway. Sorry, ladies.

Now that you’ve found your lumbersexual and fallen for him like a tree in the forest and you don’t care who hears it, make sure you two stay cozy all winter long. Get some super legit matching flannels and get to studying up on whatever gets this grizzly god of plaid outside and smiling.

Are you obsessed with lumbersexuals too? Do tell!

Mick is a guy’s-guy and is still somehow connected in an uncanny way to all things female and fashionable. He brings a unique perspective to everything from laptop reviews to fashionable home decor. In his spare time, he gives image consulting advice on products, accessories, fashion, decor (and the occasional dating tip) to his Hollywood celebrity client list. He loves his cherry red Mini Cooper and his chocolate lab, Rick.

18 Comments

  1. Ashley Moore

    i have a friend who’s like that. When we are together we are like twins covered in table cloths because we both love plaids(laughs).Now i’m thinking of giving him a plastic axe and chainsaw, i hope he would still talk to me 😀 . I think guys who have beards and mustache nowadays look hot and maybe those face hair increases their sex appeal.

  2. I am totally in love with the real lumberjacks. They’re the only thing I look forward to seeing when we go camping in the mountains.

  3. Gabby Williams

    My husband is a little bit of both. Sometimes when he is on a holiday he grows a beard and just for fun, he wears plaid. But yes, he isn’t a lumberjack. So I guess I’m also in the middle.

  4. I like my man clean. But those pictures are quite great, though.

  5. Francis Woods

    Plaid is sexy? PLAID IS SEXY!!!

  6. Hannah Mayers

    I don’t know what makes them so appealing, but they are!

    • Francis Woods

      I am a bit split into two here. I know PLAID IS SEXY. And sometimes that beard is just do appealing…but… I’m still loving that clean shave!!!

      • Beth

        Agreed! Maybe a clean-shaven lumberjack? I mostly just hate kissing a beard, tbh. I find skin-on-skin much hotter!

  7. Nice article!

    I personally think that lumbersexual is an interesting and fascinating trend, even described in the urban dictionary 🙂 I suddenly remembered Ron Swanson, a fictional character of the show “Parks and Recreation.”

    • Francis Woods

      I think I’m going to check that TV show, thanks for mentioning it!!!

  8. Courtney Watson

    I love the look! And well, I’m obsessed with lumbersexuals (I should admit 🙂

    • Francis Woods

      You are?? I’m not sure I’ve met one… I think I did but if I do ever, I would tell him to give you a call.

      • Courtney Watson

        Thanks, Francis. Would wait for your call 😉 LOL

  9. I’ve always been conflicted on this look. In one sense, I love the outdoor/rugged type. On the other hand, I think having a “groomed” guy on your arm is way more practical. Maybe a girl can have both? 😉

    • Francis Woods

      The well-groomed men are now difficult to find. Believe me I haven’t even seen one in awhile unless I trot down Wall Street.

      • Take me with you when you go for a walk in Wall Street. You will take the clean and shaved and I will spot for someone with a beanie. If I can. 🙂

    • Melani Kalev

      Haha same here, I’d also like to have a bit of both! Let’s say 50:50 😛

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