Why Women Marry Late - URBANETTE: Lifestyle Magazine & Blog

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Why Women Marry Late

Where and how does marriage fit in with our end goals?

By 

There was a time in my life when I felt like it was a given that I’d have children. I never really considered that I had other options. But, as I grow older, I’m starting to re-think that. Like so many other women, I’m realizing that modern women have other choices, and the pros of marrying late are starting to outweigh the cons.

Why Women Marry Late

So much so, in fact, that the average age of women’s (first) marriage has been pushed back from the average age of 23 years old in 1981 to between 30 and 33 years old across Europe (in America it’s still only 27). Emphasis is placed on “first marriage” as we all know how marriages have become nowadays, that is, simply defined by a piece of paper that can easily be retracted in most territories. But that’s another story.

Case in point, recently wed Kate Middleton got married to Prince William at 29 years old, in great contrast to her would-have-been mother in law Lady Diana Spencer, who entered marriage at 20 years.

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Sarah enlightens us on a daily basis with the newest trends as (and often before) they transpire. She is the consummate globe trotter. Having traveled to over 70 countries, she earns her living writing, blogging and modeling while on the road. In her spare time she gets manicures, suntans on yachts in Greece, shops for even more shoes, and lives in the limelight. She loves photography, elephants, sailboats, bangles and ballet flats.

87 Comments

  1. Melissa Princeton

    The main reason why I don’t want to get married is children! I don’t want any. But the men I met that I would consider marrying all want children. What is my luck?!

  2. Catherine Francis Meyers

    After witnessing 3 failed marriages of my mother, I am terrified to even consider marriage.

  3. Sure, it’s best to wait until you’re at an age you’re matured enough to take the serious commitment of marriage. But it’s also as important to do it with the right man. Just because your biologic clock is ticking you shouldn’t rush things with a man who you’re not sure of.

  4. Camila Hilhorst

    I really couldn’t care less who married who at what age and how long their marriage lasted. If you meet the right person it will last. That’s all I know. And I hope I find the right person one day, doesn’t matter what age.

  5. I believe marriage isn’t unnecessary but it’s important to have a special someone in your life. Nobody wants to be lonely.

    • Right but just because you don’t wannabe lonely it doesn’t mean you should hop on board with the first man that comes along.

  6. Monica Collins

    We should all be glad we’re not in ’50s anymore. Back then women didn’t have half the freedom we now have in marriages. The housewife life is so not for me!

  7. Leah Helms

    Life does begin at your 30’s. Until my 30’s I was insecure, immature, emotionally and financially unstable girl who was attracted to all the wrong kind of guys. Now I’m more mature and confident, financially stable and most important I know what I want!

  8. What marriage? I feel lucky if I get a date twice a month haha 😧😉

  9. Nicky Bryan

    The only reason why I want to get married is that I want to wear a beautiful wedding gown, and I want to have a dreamy fairytale wedding. But that can wait. 😉

  10. Kimberly Thompson

    Oh my… 😳 Reading the comments made me feel like we’re a “No To Marriage Club” haha But seriously, I think marriage is nothing but unnecessary paperwork. People can start and be a family without those papers.

  11. Anna Kaplan

    I’m a full time romantic, but marriage never seemed appealing to me. I actually think it ends love.

    • Anna Kaplan

      Well maybe, just maybe it doesn’t end love but it sure does ruin the magic of it. I must add!

  12. FACTS!!! 🙌🙌🙌 There really isn’t need for marriage to have children. If your partner agrees to it too, I’d say go for it. Besides lots of people are single parents these days, and it’s absolutely okay!

  13. Jae Medina

    I admit I got married at a very young age… 19 years old… And sometimes I think that I should have waited, but then I take a look at my look, I finished the college, I got a good job, my husband is vert supportive and loving, so I regret nothing!

    • No disrespect hun, but what was the rush for? 19 is still a child in my opinion. An adult child that is…

      • Jae Medina

        Ehh. Each to their own. My husband is in the army. And he was going to have to move far away from where I lived, and the army doesn’t allow unmarried couples to live together, so we had to get married so that we could be together! At that time I had just lost my mom, and I really needed to be beside him. If it wasn’t for him, I wouldn’t have made it alive to this day.

        • Oh no… So sorry to hear that. I hope I didn’t come out sounding judgemental. I really wasn’t judging but only giving my opinion. I wish you both best of luck and lots of happiness!

          • Jae Medina

            Thank you so much 🙂

  14. Christina Norelli

    I must admit these are valid points, but in my case I got married at the age of 22 as soon as I graduated from college, and am still happily married with a career and 3 kids, after 21 years! 🙂

    • Wow! You’re very lucky. Unfortunately you’re a rare example for this. Most of the time marriages that happen at an early age end up miserably.

      • Christina Norelli

        I know. I don’t disagree. All I’m saying is it’s not always the same. Sometimes exceptions happen, but I guess that only happens when you find “the one”… You know the soulmate… 🙂

  15. It’s best to wait till lat 20’s or early 30’s in my opinion. And to be fair, if he’s the right man, he will support you with your career, like a real man in love should!

  16. Kimberley Foulkes

    Men come and go. Love is temporary. A good career is permanent.

  17. I was engaged once. Had to break it off when I realized he was going to get in the way of my career. I’m only 31. And 30 is the new 20. Best years of my life has just started!

    • Celine Carter

      Yessss!!! 30 is the new 20! That I realized when I hit my 30th.

  18. Pamela Tucker

    Got married once, at a young age. Ended in my mid 30’s. Lost my faith in marriage. I wish I hadn’t rushed. But back in the days magazines and the media encouraged women to get married as early as they could. Now they’re warning women and telling them to wait until they’re sure. Such huge difference 20 years can make.

  19. Frances Seifert

    Funny how times have changed. Watching these old American movies women my age, already mother of 3 kids. And here I am still single and it’s socially acceptable. Wow.

  20. Nancy Musselman

    Love can happen at any age. Whether in your 20’s, 30’s or even 50’s. If you’re in love enough that you feel you should get married, then go for it. Life is too short to not live and act by impulse. Although the consequences might suck sometimes lol

  21. Emily Wentz

    I’m so glad I don’t live in an era where marriage is seen as a must. I don’t ever want to get married. I’m not against serious relationships but I don’t believe in rings, signing papers and repeating the vows out of a priest’s mouth. You feel what I’m saying? :/

  22. Kim Hartford

    The biological clock is a pain in the butt! I don’t want to get married, but I want to have kids. And I don’t know if I’m brave enough to go to a sperm bank and be a single mother for the rest of my life. It’s a terrible paradox and a dilemma.

  23. Pamela Sanabria

    The culture difference is crazy! I’m originally from Uruguay and most of my family are in Uruguay. While my family in the US think I’m too young for marriage (I’m 24), my relatives in Uruguay think I’m getting too old to find a good husband haha.

  24. In my opinion there’s no need to rush marriage. Especially if you don’t want to have children. I have been with my boyfriend for 11 years now, and even though it feels like we know everything about each other, and everybody says it’s time we get married, we still want to wait a little. Marriage changes a lot of things. And what we have is perfect, so why risk losing it?

  25. Great piece all over, Sarah.👏I couldn’t agree more on the “Life begins at 30” part. Besides both men and women are hardly actually ready for marriage and serious commitments before their 30’s.

  26. Maria Bruce

    Just be careful not to get into early pregnancy if you don’t want to get married! Think thoroughly in every situation.

  27. Joss Butler

    Whatever happens, I just want my first marriage, my first girlfriend to be my last. And yes, I haven’t had a girlfriend before. Haha

  28. Quin Meri

    Marriage is never a race. You shouldn’t let the pressure get to you because those who rushed, they are the ones who get into a failed marriage and you don’t want that to happen to you.

  29. Jenifer Jeni

    Well, people should be careful with what they want. They might not want to get married right now, but they might end up not getting married at all!

  30. Leah Turner

    I don’t plan on getting married. But I want to have a kid!

  31. Paul Daiz

    It’s never wrong to be married while achieving your dreams. You and your wife can do it together! Instant goals as a couple.

  32. Nah. Getting married will just delay my goals and might end up not achieving them. I would like to do them before I get married so there will be no “what if’s” and I’m ready for it.

    • Jeni Morgan

      Your partner could understand what you want on life if he really wants to be with you.

  33. Ofelia Ruley

    You don’t need a man to make yourself feel complete. You, you are as a woman is enough to do and make changes in your life!

  34. Do what you think is best for you and for your future. The opinion of others is just an opinion. The decision will always end up in you.

  35. Doreen Morales

    It’s okay to get married if your 40! Love doesn’t put age as a requirement in getting married.

  36. Hachi Komatsu

    Most of the women right now that enjoys online dating sites are in the 40’s along with the teenagers.😂

  37. Live life how you want it. Get married or not, it’s your decision as long as you’ll be happy about it.

  38. jenifer

    Being married is hard like having a relationship. You always need to consider the feelings of your partner when you want to do something for your life. They could either hinder you or support you.👌

  39. Zoraida Martin

    You don’t have to feel rushed with all those marriage thingies. As long as you are happy with your position in life and you’re still not ready, don’t fall for it. It might result in a failed marriage and we don’t want that to happen.

  40. Della Martin

    Running against the clock? Well if you’re already at the age where you can’t conceive anymore, you can always adopt if you want to have a child. You helped a child to have a better life, and you helped lessen the population. It’s a win-win situation.

  41. Rosalia Russell

    Getting married is on the back of my mind. I don’t feel left behind by my friends who are now either married or engage. As they will get tied with their husbands and won’t be able to do things that I can do. Like traveling alone, and having time for myself.

  42. i don’t believe that you have to be married when you reach a certain age. You don’t need to rush things.

  43. Helen Wright

    Just don’t get married young and if you’re not ready.

  44. I want to get married even if I’m young. I can have kids early so that I can be with them for a long time, unlike when I bear them when I’m nearly off my age. My time will be limited. The next thing I know is that they’ll be off to college.

  45. Elizabeth Gonzalez

    Marriage should be made if the both of you are matured and on the same page in life! AND get married if you only want to.

  46. Karen Abeyta

    I’ve always wanted to focus on my career. Marriage won’t help you buy the things that you need.

  47. Henriett Bond

    My ex-wife and I got a divorce a few months ago. It was a mutual decision. The marriage was just falling off. I guess we got lucky we still don’t have a kid.

  48. Maxine Ford

    I want to have a family in the future but not right now. This is why me and my boyfriend still doesn’t live together. We’ve been together for a year and he understands what I want in my life. I’m happy that he’s supportive.

    • Connie Schmidt

      consider yourself lucky, girl…

  49. Joan Morales

    I had two divorces. I never wanted a third. It’s hard not only to me but also to my kids. I never wanted them to experience this kind of a pain in their life.💔

    • Esther Devine

      I grew up from a broken marriage. Nothing could be even more traumatizing for a child than having his/her parents separated.

  50. Brittany West

    Trust me, you need to be BOTH ready in deciding to get married. It’s a big decision in life. It was never easy.

  51. Beatrice Joaquin

    I want to get married after I’ve finished my bucket list that I need to do before I turn 30.

  52. Lisa Bryson

    I live with the quote “You only live once” because I want to travel and to put up my career first. Marriage can wait.

    • Lucy

      I love your perspective!

  53. Yeah, this is why we have a freedom to make decisions that we want for our life. As long as we’re happy, keep going.😍

  54. Don’t get married just because of your young and in love. GET MARRIED IF THE BOTH OF YOU ARE READY!

  55. Deanna Woods

    Well, all things could fall in the right place and the right time.

  56. Genie Mackenzie

    for me, it’s fine to get married late if you still want to achieve a lot of things for yourself. Just remember that if you still want to get married and have kids, you need to be the right age to bear a kid.

    • Eloise Ferris

      I agree. You should consider your age when you want to have a kid.

  57. Carmen Griffin

    We shouldn’t rush things! We got all the time in the world.

  58. Arlene Davis

    In my opinion, I think 35 could be a good age to start settling down if you want to. 😊

    • April Henry

      Yeah could be a good age also to have a baby.

  59. Ronald Smith

    I don’t mind dating and getting married at a later time with a woman at my age (43) as long as they’re ready to settle down. I don’t need to have kids. I just want someone to grow old with 😊

  60. Very true! A successful and happy marriage is when a woman is able to achieve personal goals even before getting married 🙂

  61. Sandra Brown

    Why women marry late?! In the past, most people measure a woman's success if she is a wife, has a family of her own and has children. BUT nowadays, professional / career success is given importance. In this modern age, women marry late because they have seen (at least in my own point of view) the importance of having a successful and established career BEFORE everything else.

  62. This was a really interesting perspective on marriage. I'd figured women were getting married later, since social expectations have changed so much, but it's nice to see so many women are putting their independence first!

  63. I believe that woman use to marry early because it's what's expected of them. Woman were only viewed to take care of the home and have children. But now we have so many options. We can independent, successful, date around and be happy. We allow more time to work on ourselves before anything else which is a good thing. But sometimes our drive for success may blind other things of importance, settling down, getting married and having children. I think getting married at 40 is just too late. Women may want to have kids but feel they need to get married first, if you want children, have them. You don't necessarily need a spouse (although it would be nice) to procreate.

  64. Jen Spillane

    I believe that the age at which a person first marries is also statistically correlated with that marriage lasting, which could be another good reason to delay marriage…

  65. Sarah Evanston

    I could totally see wanting to marry late because of success. Its important for your self-esteem to establish your own success and be independent. It's dangerous to be financially dependent on someone else.

  66. mmmm.. All I can say is, being a woman is challenging but fun and I definitely LOVE BEING A WOMAN!

  67. Gabrielle Williams

    Why Did I Marry Late?
    Because I thought I’m happy to be alone… I thought that I’m fulfilled having to think only of myself… But when friends and colleagues started to get married and have a life of their own, I realized this is not the life I wanted, I realized my life would be better if I have a partner whom I can share the rest of my life with, if I have someone to hug in the middle of the night and whom I would wake up with each morning..

  68. Joanne Samonte

    I personally believe that the key to successful marriage and family life is when you, as a woman, is able to achieve your personal goals, dreams and aspirations. I’m not saying that a partner can not help you or will hinder you in achieving it, but if you already have a partner or family, your priorities will somehow be changed.
    Most of my ‘girl’ friends are not yet married at age 33 because they are still aiming for ‘that’ position in their respective companies.

  69. Randie Cadiogan

    Education and career are top priorities for many a modern women = true! 🙂

    As a working woman, I find this to be factual. 🙂  The number of women who wants to achieve financial independence first before marriage is indeed growing!  Men, just please don’t be intimidated by a woman who is successful, who has power, and who has riches! 🙂 

  70. Francis Woods

    I know! Times have changed. When my sister decided to get married at 25, almost everyone in the family thought that she was too young. I think it was only her fiance’s grandfather who thought she was old enough to marry.

    • Carol Thompson

      I think 25 is fine. A little bit young but it’s good.

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