Everyone has times when they don’t feel like their best, most attractive or confident selves. Working through difficult times like these can actually make you stronger and more confident in the long run. When you’re in the middle of one of these stretches, it can be difficult to know how to work your way out of it. If this sounds familiar to you, try some of these tips to boost your confidence:
Change Your Appearance
Looking good can greatly increase your confidence. While you don’t need to drastically alter your appearance, simply taking a shower, shaving, putting on makeup and dressing nicely can help you feel ready to start that day. Again, this doesn’t mean you need to buy designer or expensive clothing, it just means dress for the situation (or even overdress a little) to help you feel special.
Another idea is to change up your style. If you’ve had the same hair color for ages, try changing it (you can do it yourself at home). Try some new up-do’s. Even just changing your makeup routine (hello, red lipstick!) or your shoe choice can give you a little boost.
Stop Reading Print Magazines
Studies show that women feel crummy about themselves, and their long-term self-esteem suffers, when they read print magazines. Looking at Photoshopped photos of models gets even models feeling less attractive, because even though we may consciously know that the images are fantasy, our subconscious brain still picks up on the harmful messaging; that we must look flawless, skinny and sultry if we expect to be loveable and sexy. And it’s all in an effort to sell us more products we really don’t need.
So don’t listen. Better yet — don’t expose your brain to that messaging at all; read online blogs or indie magazines, like Urbanette, instead.
Be Grateful
It’s easy to get fixated on the things you want rather than being thankful for what you already have. This often leads you to focus on your weaknesses as a person rather than your strengths.
One way to reorganize your thought process is to write down three things you are grateful for and why each day. These things don’t need to be groundbreaking gratitudes, but rather small victories such as the sunny sky overhead or the cup of coffee you grabbed with a friend. Remembering to focus on the positive things in your life helps you rediscover your confidence in a real way.
Try Meditation
This might seem a little too new age for some people, but true self-confidence is all about self-awareness. If you become more aware of your feelings and why you are having those specific feelings, it is easier to accept the things you cannot change and be confident to affect the things you can.
One of the objectives during meditation is to observe yourself and surroundings without judgement. You can’t avoid or make something happen during meditation, nor are you trying to. Just sit quietly and observe (and let go of) your thoughts as a third party. Through a more thorough understanding of yourself, you can acknowledge both your strengths and weaknesses, without judgement. This eventually leads to inner calm and confidence — I promise!
Exercise
Physical activity can burn off some of your pent up emotions. Going to the gym, joining a sports team or doing any sort of regular exercise can get your body in shape and improve your mental health. Getting in a rhythm of working out also creates positive momentum and something for you to build on. The more you work out, the more you’ll want to work out. And you just might make some new friends while you’re at it.
Where meditation is all about internal and mental results, working out is all about the external, something you can see in the mirror as well as feel in your energy levels.
Think Positive
When it comes to self-confidence, your thoughts can be your best friends or your worst enemies. It’s important to remember that your emotions mirror your thoughts. So, if you are focusing on negative thoughts, you’re more likely to feel sad or angry.
It is up to you to decide which thoughts are helpful, positive ones, and which are harmful. By discarding the negative thoughts, you will be able to focus on being productive and feeling confident.
What do you do when you’re feeling down, to make yourself feel better?
Feelings of self-confidence based on your appearance are purely in your mind. This isn’t to say that they’re imaginary but that your confidence depends on your personal thoughts and perceptions about the way you look. If you can change the way you think about your appearance, you can change your level of self-confidence.
Confidence is not something you have or have not, its the way you behave in new situations. New patterns of behavior must be learned. Insanity is doing the same thing over & over and then expecting a different result. If you are looking for love the confidence to keep eye contact is the key & then just say Hi & Hey. No silly pick up lines line I wish, I had a 9-foot penguin at times like this. Why? To break the ice. I suppose after the ice is broken you either sink or swim.
What is this thing called ” confidence”, this concept is new to us introverts?
Guess what, guess what, I once was really confident about doing a trick on my bike, I shattered my knee.
When I got the call for my first job interview, I was scared to death, but I overcame my fears by going about my days not thinking about it. If the thought popped into my head, I would brush it away. For the whole ride to the interview, I never thought about it. When I got there, I was just nervous, not scared, but even though I didn’t get the job at the first interview, I got the job at the second one.
Thanks for the motivation. I feel really pumped up right now.
Great article! Another point to add, which I find very useful. Instead of wondering, “Do I have confidence?” or “How to get confidence/be confident?”, just don’t think about it. You already have confidence inside of you, and whenever you don’t feel confident, it’s because you are throwing your confidence away. Don’t think so much about whether you are confident, or whether you can do it. Just try. Just go for it. JUST DO IT.
Anything is possible, once you start to understand the power of the human mind. I overcame my dad molesting me, being drugged and raped, amongst many other challenges, by understanding Neuroplasticity. And how we can rewire our neurons, to change the way we think. Once you start to understand the power of the human mind, you can overcome PTSD, depression, addiction and so much more ❤
Too bad that I hate myself when the failure comes. Because I’m ain’t good. I make mistakes day by day, and NOTHING shows reason to be confident or be happy, or anything else. Sometimes the failure hits so bad, that I want to commit suicide. (but yet planned how to end my life, sadly, and always find the reason to live: to make other people’s day go wrong, Those pieces of advice doesn’t work for me. I got tired to live, actually.
Maybe the people around you are making these failures seem ten times worse? If this is true, man gets away from them and find people like you!! Put yourself out there and find people that accept you and your failures!!
Confidence is when you walk into a room assuming everyone already likes you! This quote helps every time I want to talk to strangers or have a presentation in class.