7 Steps to Prevent Infidelity

Sometimes even the best relationships have hiccups. As couples go through their ups-and-downs, it’s important not to let our ‘downs’ become disastrous. Here are a few tips to smooth the ride and avoid a breakup-worthy disaster:

1. Recognize that work can be a danger zone.

• Don’t have lunch or take coffee breaks frequently with the same person.
• Don’t get into discussions around the water cooler with co-workers that you find attractive.
• When you travel with a co-worker, meet in public, not in a room with a bed.
• At the office party, pretend the coworker who’s flirting with you has gonorrhea, then talk about your happy relationship, or better yet, talk to someone else.

2. Minimize your alcohol and drug intake when you’re not with your significant other.

Skip that third beer when you’re out with the guys, or the second martini with work colleagues. Mistakes happen more frequently when you’re not thinking clearly. We all know that unintended hookups happen when alcohol is involved. Bad ideas somehow become irresistible, and in the morning you’ll have to deal with the damaging consequences.

3. Avoid emotional intimacy with attractive alternatives to your committed relationship.

Resist the desire to rescue an unhappy soul who pours their heart out to you. Emotional disclosures are the first step to building an inappropriate emotional bond that could end up in an affair. Most affairs aren’t planned, and they’re often with people less physically attractive than their spouse.

4. Protect your marriage by discussing relationship issues at home.

If you do need to talk to someone else about your marriage, be sure that person is a friend of the marriage, and not someone you find attractive. If the friend is knocking marriage in general, respond with something positive about your own relationship.

Cheaters say the danger developed because emotional intimacy grew over time with someone they worked with.

5. Don’t go over the line when you’re on-line with Internet friends.

Discuss your online friendships with your partner and show him/her your email if they’re interested. Invite them to join in your correspondence so your Internet friends won’t get any wrong ideas. And definitely don’t exchange sexual fantasies online (i.e., don’t be an Anthony Weiner!).

6. Keep old flames from reigniting.

If a former lover is coming to the class reunion, invite your partner to come along. If you value your marriage, think twice about having lunch with an old flame.

7. Make sure your friends are supportive of your marriage.

Surround yourself with friends who are happily married and who don’t believe in fooling around.