Invite me to a party and my reply will be an automatic “no” after pretending to consider it. In my head, I continue our conversation: “Why can’t we just stay in today? Maybe order some Chinese, watch a movie, play a game of Monopoly?” But I know not to bother; I’m aware how boring that’ll sound to almost everyone else, especially in a college environment that screams possibility. Well, that’s okay, because I’m fine with staying in by myself, curled up with a good book and alone with my thoughts.
Why will I usually turn down your party invitation for an evening alone? Probably because I’m an introvert.
Let’s set a few things straight. I have no problem talking to new people, as long as they’re not intimidating and we’re in a one-on-one situation. I have no problem talking in front of the camera; I have no problem talking period. I can talk on and on whether I’m with my friends, in front of the camera, or participating in class. If I disagree with you, I’ll tell you to your face. I like hanging out with people when I feel comfortable enough around them. I even have some extroverted traits. No one’s completely one or the other; however, these characteristics are overshadowed by my more dominant, introverted side. So what’s the real difference between these two extremes?
It’s how they get their energy. Introverts are charged internally, meaning they create their own energy. They’re also easily stimulated, which is why their energy is more quickly spent, and why they often need alone time to recharge. It isn’t that introverts hate social situations – it’s that their capacity for them is limited. Extroverts are energized by outside forces, but are less easily stimulated, which is why they’re always seeking more thrills. Things that energize extroverts will usually enervate introverts. A nightclub, for example, would be a battery charger for extroverts, but a battery drainer for introverts.
It isn’t that introverts hate social situations – it’s that their capacity for them is limited.
Extroverts, you really need to give your counterparts more credit. Introverts like hanging out with people and they like to talk – in my case, a lot; however, they’re not as outgoing and energetic. This isn’t a bad thing – it’s just different. Give introverts their space when they need it. Forcing them to go out to a club with you might just stress them out. Extroverts also need their calm moments, so why not use that time to sit down for a one-on-one with your introverted friend. Chatting over coffee or going on a shopping spree can be both fun and relaxing.
Introverts, ignore the recent studies that say extroverts are happier. I personally find it really difficult to act like a complete extrovert, and doing so definitely doesn’t make me happy. In fact, it just stresses me out more. I cringe at pretending to smile, and awkwardly dancing to convince everyone I’m having the time of my life isn’t my idea of fun, either.
It isn’t bad to socialize and step out of your comfort zone once in a while, but you don’t need to pretend to be someone you’re not. To echo Susan Cain, who wrote Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, I don’t think introversion is a problem that can be solved by acting extroverted. That’s because introversion isn’t a problem at all!
I want introverts to embrace who they are and realize their worth. They’re the deep thinkers, the innovators, the sensitive poets. It’s time for society to embrace not only extroversion but also introversion. Without one or the other, this society would not function.
Introverts are widely misunderstood. We aren’t shy, and we’re definitely not boring. As a matter of fact, many famous celebrities, some of whom you probably adore, are introverts. There’s the gorgeous Keira Knightley who, despite her fierce and fearless movie roles, is just like me (and by “just like me,” I mean a much more attractive and talented version of me). Then there’s the adorable Amanda Seyfried, who, despite playing the role of a famous porn star, is another introvert. I could go on and on here, maybe pointing out influential public figures, such as J.K. Rowling and Barack Obama, who are also self-proclaimed introverts.
I’m not ashamed of the fact that I’m basically waving these names around like banners for my people. To this end, I ask that everyone take a moment to applaud all the introverts out there! (To which I respond, “Thank you, thank you,” and not-so-gracefully bow.)
Do you consider yourself an introvert or an extrovert, or do you think the distinction is arbitrary? Speak out in the comments section!
I’m an introvert and I love to travel. But when I’m in a place that I’m not familiar with, I’d rather enjoy my own company than to purposely find new people to meet in my journey. I enjoy being independent in all the things I do, although of course I wouldn’t reject help from others when I need it. It just goes to show that not all introverts are the stay at home type of person. Others also love to go out, explore and be adventurous. But it doesn’t mean that they enjoy socializing.?
I used to have this college friend who claims to be an introvert. She’s the leader type and actually likes hanging out with a big group of people. However, the funny thing is that there are times that she would be totally withrawn from the group and would just group text everybody and say, “I need me time. See you guys later!” She’s always like that and we learned to accept that about her. I guess just like any other type of personality, we all need to socialize but the moment it starts to exhaust us, that’s when the introvert within us comes out.
That’s really adorable that you guys just respect it whenever she suddenly doesn’t feel like hanging out.
There’s nothing to be ashamed about when you’re an introvert. Everyone is different!
Personally, the hardest part of being an introvert is finding romance/relationships. Mainly because men would often see us as boring even if they don’t know us just yet. From where I live, men would always lean towards those who are extroverts because those are the girls who seem fun and outgoing. While I’m here, sitting in one corner enjoying my drink or food, I wouldn’t dare to approach the men who I find attractive just to get their numbers. Introverts are often labeled as snobbish sometimes.
I really agree with this article. Introverts really do charge internally and rely on these moments to release stress or any other negative emotions they start to feel from being overly stimulated!
I also think that the introverts are the creative artists. Those who enjoy sitting in one corner of their room, enjoying the company of their sketch pads, pencils, watercolors or any other medium of art. They’re the ones who spend hours writing poetry or short stories. The ones who see the beauty in everything that the extroverts can’t even stop to appreciate. Us introverts are also that kind of friend that would often observe, and could offer the greatest advice in the whole wide world. Why? Because we do more listening than talking.
You can’t really switch from being an introvert to an extrovert. That’s just stupid. That would really stress you out.
You failed to mention that some introverts are the overthinkers in life.
It is difficult to admit to yourself that you are an introvert.
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But actually, for the introvert, it’s more like stimulus goes in, then we give a quick reaction, then we talk about it, then it’s processed by the brain. It can’t really be processed until we talk about it or respond to it.”