I was talking to my best friend the other day, and she admitted something to me. That about a year ago, a guy she dated for a about a month gave her herpes. The shocking part was that he had an outbreak the first time they got naked and, when she asked about it, he said that it’s not a disease — that his penis had simply always had those marks on it. She trusted him and, consequently, two weeks later, she had her first outbreak of this incurable disease. When she confronted him, he denied it, but she could see on his face that he was lying. Whether his hormones took over, was too embarrassed to talk about it, or he simply wanted to feel ‘normal’, she’ll never know. At any rate, it was unfortunately too little too late, for her.
It’s not easy to accept having a STD. For those that suffer from them, it’s common to want to ignore the issue. In attempts to feel normal, some simply don’t get tested (too scary!) or knowingly continue to spread the infection or STD through unprotected sex.
Could it be, for that individual’s various personal reasons, the spread of STDs and STIs are not always accidental, but rather, deliberate?
This is not to say that those carrying infection or disease are deliberately trying to harm others. Although there have been cases of very conscious and deliberate STD spreading (apparently some feel that they’ll be more normal if others have the disease as well), this is not the norm in general.
Usually, in an effort to deal with such a serious and anxiety-ridden personal issue, continued unprotected sex is a semi-unconscious reaction. The infected person rationalizes the concern for the other person’s safety away, or simply forces one’s self not to think about it at all. As a result, there are 19 million new cases of STDs each year.
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, every year, 1 out of 4 teenagers contract a sexually transmitted disease.
I mean, I get it. Coming to terms with having a STD like herpes or HIV would be so awful that I’d want to just ignore it too. It’s life changing, which is why denial of the condition easily accompanies this reality. Dishonesty runs rampant for those infected. I mean, who would want to risk their friends or colleagues finding out about their secret? Fear of rejection by family and friends is understandable.
They protect their secret because they don’t want to risk seeming unattractive, like they could be damaging to others, or because it has the possibility of making it hard to have a ‘normal’ relationship. The stigma presented by the general public is enough to encourage a carrier to hide this unfortunate truth.
People with STD’s are no different when it comes to wanting a normal life, sexual and otherwise. Most often, they do not have ill-will or a desire to deliberately spread the infection (although some misogynists have admitted to doing exactly that). Again, continued sexual intercourse without disclosure is often an emotional and unconscious reaction to a deep desire to maintain a normal life.
In attempts to feel normal, they continue to have unprotected sex and spread the disease.
Here are a few things you should know:
- Condoms protect against HIV, but not against many other STD’s like herpes and genital warts.
- If your partner has spots or sores — stay away!!
- A blood test can tell you if you have herpes.
- Herpes can be spread even without visible symptoms.
- Always use a condom.
- Look for signs of other diseases that a condom can’t protect against, like herpes.
- Ask your partner if they have a STD before you start making out (once you’re in the thick of it, they’re even less likely to be honest). But don’t trust a person just because they say they’re ‘clean’.
What it boils down to is picking partners who aren’t ‘players’ (the less sexual partners they’ve had, in theory, the lower the risk), and –I hate to say it– opting to masturbate instead of going home with that hot guy from the bar. The less partners you have, the lower your risk. Oh yeah; and do your next partner a favor — get tested!
Most people who have STD are gays. I’m disgusted with things like that because I’m a straight male and I stick to one girl at a given time. The chances of me getting an STD will be lower, compared to a gay dude that goes from one gay person to another!
Your opinion is irrelevant. Regardless of genders, we can all get STD if we’re not careful. It’s not about being gay or not.
The rise of STD and HIV cases are seriously soaring. It’s very alarming because it’s transmitted in a way that most human beings are really involved with. Thefore, very easily transmitted to the general population. Only time will tell on how this percentage can increase faster in due time…
I can’t really see what else we can do in the hopes of curing all STD / HIV. Other than protecting ourselves, I think we need to respect ourselves as well. I never found it moral to have excessive and multiple sex partners to the point that people are subconsciously spreading STD / HIV. Ladies, if you respect yourself, have the decency to contain your sexual urges and do not have different partners every day just for the sake of cheap thrills. I know how easy it is for women to give in even on the first date in this century. This is where all the harm comes in because we treat sex like it’s something we can do freely; with anyone, with the frequency that we want. We fail to be rational enough whether what we are doing is safe or right. We just succumb to that urge without thinking twice.
I’ve met men who never learn from their mistakes. Friends of friends, in that case. Some of them got STD that’s curable and they just got antibiotics for it. After that, they were having sex like there’s no tomorrow again. Who knows, one day, maybe, they won’t get the curable one anymore.
Getting an STD will teach you that trial and error isn’t the best way in choosing sex partners. You can’t turn back time once you’ve had it.?
Most of you would probably think that men are the ones who usually spread STD, but you’re wrong. I know that it’s usually men who victimize women into unprotected sex or that it’s usually us who has it. But my story is the other way around. I met this very pretty girl at the most random of times. Went in a couple of dates with her and we were just hitting the right buttons all the time. She seemed clean. I guess my head was also clouded by the fact that it’s usually men who are the carriers and not women. It’s not like I’d ask her if she has multiple partners or that she’s clean, because that seems a little rude to do. She didn’t look like a whore to me or anyone who would just randomly have sex with people. She just looked clean, alright? Fast forward, we just decided to do it after an amazing dinner date. Still, for me, she looked clean. It was too late for me to realize that women could be the worst carriers of STD at times because their symptoms don’t manifest similarly to how men do with all the rashes and puss. If it ain’t obvious just yet, I got sick and she never told me shit.
Exactly! Everyone can be a victim and everyone can be the carrier. Judgments aren’t always accurate, so be on the safe side instead of taking chances.
I’m one of those people who are victims of deliberately spreading STD. It’s too late for me to regret all my wrong decisions, but I’m hopeful that it’s not too late for most. Be rational about your actions and always remember to protect yourself at all costs. No buts or excuses. Protect yourself.
You can blame porn for letting the young generation have unprotected sex even at an early age. The younger generation is the ones who feel ashamed of buying condoms because they know that most of them aren’t even in the legal age to be doing so. Porn is readily available on the internet and not all parents can monitor what these teens do 24/7 in their smartphones, tablets, and laptops. It makes them feel like sex is something that they crave badly, to the point that they coerce other people into doing it, regardless of being ready (with a condom or any protection). Because of porn, they think sex is a normal thing to do, regardless of age. I can just imagine if one teen is infected with it, it can spread like wildfire to others because of how easy sex is available to them.
I agree because teens aren’t responsible enough yet with their actions. I’m not generalizing, but let’s just say that there’s a higher percentage of teens who are impulsive and would care less about other people as long as they do or get what they want.
Not only are those who deliberately spread STD irresponsible, they also have serious problems mentally.
Others really take pleasure in the pain of others. I don’t know why, but I just don’t understand it. I don’t see them getting any benefits from what they are doing. It’s not like the ones they give STD to will accept them for who they are, because it’s a really despicable act.