After being lied to by countless feckless boyfriends, I decided to get smarter. I was sick of learning about their dishonesty way after the fact. In a relationship, it’s unfortunately quite normal for our partners to lie here and there. That doesn’t mean you should just sit back and take it!
Though they may sound convincing, their bodies can give us clues as to whether they’re being truthful. Here’s how the subtle aspects of their body language reveal clues for us to get a clearer picture of what the truth is:
He Keeps on Moving
When people are lying, they usually touch their ears, chin, or some other parts of their bodies. They will fidget restlessly and might have their hands clasped behind their backs or make slight swaying movements, as if they are ready to bolt. These are unconscious gestures that are not caused by some outward precedent — more likely, these actions are a manifestation of an internal battle on how to get out of the “interrogation.”
He Looks Like He’s in a Sauna
If your partner was just caught lying then they he will likely start to break into sweat. Sometimes guilty liars turn red when confronted. Look for small beads of perspiration on their forehead or neck. Also, try to observe their emotional responses, either through facial expression or the eyes. Usually, a liar’s expression won’t match the expected emotion linked with the dishonest words coming out of his mouth.
Don’t Break Eye Contact
When you think that your partner is lying to you, then this is the perfect time to maintain eye contact while he’s talking. A guilty person will either awkwardly avert his eyes when you stare straight into them, or will be so conscious of trying to convince you that they won’t break eye contact at all. Either way, it’ll seem slightly unnatural. This is a clear indication that your partner is not telling you everything.
Catch the Defensive Stance
Liars can’t seem to stay in one place for a few seconds. They start puttering around, leafing through pages from magazines or books, without really paying attention to the content. This simply means that they are thinking very hard about what to do or say next in case their alibi doesn’t work.
Keep Your Voice Down
Liars usually start to become defensive when asked certain questions that they don’t plan to answer truthfully. Often, the volume goes up and the tone become sarcastic, or he tries to sound offended, as he tries to evade the questions you keep on pressing on him. There are also times when your partner will “act” angry just to show that you have just insulted him by calling him a liar. If this does happen, try to look at his nose and see if it flares up or not. If it flares up then they really are angry, and if it doesn’t, then it’s likely he is just putting on an act.
If you know your partner well, then all your need is to observe if there is something different about the way they talk, move or act. These body language clues will tell you if there is something off. That said, remember that that honesty and trust are the basic foundations of a healthy romantic relationship and so you and your partner must be clear on these expectations from the start. Listen to your gut. If you sense that your partner is acting weird and that something is amiss; don’t just dismiss it as nothing. Communicate with your concerns with your partner — and if in the process you find that things are not going they way you want in your relationship, then perhaps it’s best to split up. You owe it yourself to be happy, with or without him.
IMPORTANT. I found screenshots of my guy messaging this girl on Instagram and him even discussing they messenger that he had messaged the girl to his friends. I showed him the screenshots and he said he had never seen that girl In his life and never messaged her. These screenshots were from months before he even knew who I was but the fact he got so defensive and continued to lie while caught is sketchy. I even asked his BEST friend and his best friend said that he was lying. I have his FB password and there have been no other girls he had talked to and to his friends and family he would only talk about me and how much he likes me. But I don’t know why he just won’t admit the truth about messaging that girl, in the past, before he ever met me. We have a pretty transparent relationship and he’s said he loves me and plans on marrying me someday, so why is he being so edgy about this? Should I overlook this and move on.
A lot of the time my gut tells me something is off and yea he’s probably lying, but I can’t prove it so I keep doubting myself. I hope this tips will work and I could find out the truth.
Whether they are small, innocent half-truths or something more serious, a husband’s lies can create distrust and contempt–and spoil a relationship. If you believe that your husband has something to hide, examining his body language, making eye contact and asking for details can alert you to holes in his story. Observe the sings and make out if he is lying.
Unfortunately, I was with a guy for 2 1/2 YEARS that lied to me about everything…even when he didn’t have to lie. Small or big…everyday I found out something new. I discovered a lot, bit by bit but he’d even admit things I didn’t know about then say he lied about it being true. He cheated on me days after moving in with me and had several different girls a week. He is a sociopath. I learned a lot though from his verbal abuse, insults, lies, and behavior. I will never put up with someone treated me badly again.
Dating someone for 6 months and trusted him and in the end, he told me he was married, now I have trust issues and don’t trust my intuition, we were done and blocked his number afterward.
I felt like a guy was lying to me and his social media proved it. eventually, when I asked him if he was still talking to his ex-girlfriend he said yes. on our first date. liar and ruthless. left him.
Don’t let him bluff you into making excuses for his behavior, confuse you, twist your words, twist the truth, or make out that YOU haven’t heard right, or there’s something wrong with you, my EX did this to me for 4 years and it completely messed me up. Hence been on my own for 8 years since as I feel I can no longer trust my own gut instinct or rather be able to stand up for myself, when that first flag goes up and there’s no logical explanation, then run, run like hell to the people that you know do love you and wouldn’t lie to you. Don’t make excuses for liars, it messes with your head – seriously. Best wishes.
My boyfriend lies all the time about small stupid stuff. I ask him why to lie about that. He tells me he doesn’t want me to Bitch. When I figure out he lied to me we argue about it. So I mean what Is the point? I’m left feeling hurt and wondering what else he lies about.
Same here, I don’t know what to do at this point. I don’t know if I should move on or not?
Being in a relationship is fun yet challenging. Challenging in a sense that you’ll pass through a lot of difficulties that you have with your gf/bf. But one thing that we usually tend to feel is fear. Fear of being betrayed or being hurt. But I think we all deserved to be happy. If we are always afraid of some things, we won’t appreciate how wonderful it is to love and to be loved back in return. It’s common to get hurt in a relationship. And at the end of the time, if our partner will cheat, then it’s their loss. Yeah, it’s painful. But we have to accept the fact that some people are not meant to stay in our lives forever. So, maybe waiting for the right person to come is the best thing to do. Just an opinion.
Any help or advice will be greatly appreciated. I just found out my fiance has been talking to other girls & even has nudes of them. He hasn’t met up with anyone nor has time to physically cheat; he goes to work & comes home. I’m hurt & still see this as cheating. He deleted all the pics & deleted the apps but I can’t get over it. April last year I first found the app & he swore he deleted it then only for me to find it 18 months later. Im hurt, I’m angry. He’s been such a wonderful partner & father to my son. While battling Stage IV cancer he was by my side & practically raising my son on his own. I don’t know what to do.