In the age of Trump, it seems as though we’ve slipped backwards in time. It’s once again assumed that if you’re a woman, you must be good at cooking, cleaning, and making men happy. Unfortunately for my hubby, I wasn’t blessed with the motivation to work on these domestic gifts. If it wasn’t for UberEats and the pre-made food section at Whole Foods, I’d probably have died well before I had the chance to get hitched. Luckily for me, my hubby is a feminist so he’s happy to cook, clean, make me smoothies, and still be my big strong, sexy (and breadwinning) man.
Society encourages young girls to turn on their Easy-Bake Ovens and dress up their American Girl dolls, all in preparation for a life of housekeeping and child-rearing. I may’ve gone down that path myself, if not for the time I burnt my hand trying to make a brownie.
Aside from Trump trying his best to drag us all back into the dark ages, as time passed, thoughts have slowly progressed about the roles of women in society. Bursting out of their kitchens, women broke into the business world and turned perspectives upside down. Breaking barriers that once seemed impossible for women to do, you’d think that most men would now have no choice but to see women as equals in the workplace, and soon, the home. But do they?
As women began to be taken more seriously, the myths and stereotypes about women have been consistently called into question. Gone, it seemed, were the archaic ideas that all women want is to get married and have children, as more and more women these days are satisfied with putting their careers first.
I don’t feel any shame about being bad at “women’s work,” and I’m not convinced there’s any reason I should be.
Buttttt, based on the fact that so many white women voted for Trump because their husbands wanted them to, it seems we still have a long way to go. So this seems like an opportune time to clarify a few things, in case Trump or any of his followers are reading this:
Myth: All women are good cooks.
Truth: This one is definitely not true — just ask my husband! In our home, my hubby does the cooking, but across America the task still typically falls to women. A survey by the Bureau of Labor Statistics reported that on an average day, 83% of women do some sort of housework, compared to 65% of men. With respect to food preparation and clean-up specifically, only 40% of men, compared to 66% of women, take responsibility for it. So, it’s not so much that women are good cooks as it is they tend to get saddled with that task more, because of our still-sexist society.
Myth: All women are good at cleaning.
Truth: We all know the gender roles when it comes to cleanliness for boys and girls: boys are expected to be filthy while girls are expected to be prim. As for adults — how many times have you seen a man pushing a vacuum around a room or cleaning up after kids in a TV commercial? Exactly.
Wondering why a vacuum cleaner is still in the portrait of a standard housewife? One women’s magazine article said cleaning is a form of meditation. Another article said that women just have higher standards of cleanliness. They both go on to say that if a house is a mess, the woman living there is the one who’ll be judged, not the man. Yikes!
Myth: All women are all feminists.
Truth: I wish (!!), but clearly not — as IMHO a feminist wouldn’t vote for Trump. Not because Trump is a man who ran against a woman, but because Trump is a sexist pig who thinks it’s perfectly acceptable to sexually abuse and objectify women.
The definition of feminism comes down to the fact that women are equal to men and deserve every opportunity to prove it, not that feminists think men are scum (they don’t! that’s missing the point!). Feminists aren’t a different breed of person, they just demand the acknowledgement that anything a man can do, a woman can do.
I want a man to hold a door open for me, but I also want women to get promotions for their hard work, and not be judged based on how we look in a skirt. Empowering organizations such as Lean In aren’t trying to make women kick all men to the curb, but instead give them the tools to realize they can and should stand on their own two feet without feeling inferior to men in and outside of the workplace.
Myth: Women don’t enjoy sex as much as guys.
Truth: Just because I’m not running around trying to sleep with everyone that looks good doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy sex. Women are just a bit more reserved about it, or at least they tend to be. Maybe if we weren’t pressured to be a “sexy virgin” by society, we’d act more like men do. Plus, we don’t have sex just to make the other person feel good (unless we’re deep down the rabbit hole of self-objectification); it’s about us, too, and don’t you forget it.
Myth: All women love to shop.
Truth: Personally, I hate shopping. The minute I’m inside a mall or clothing store, I want to get out. That’s why I do all my shopping online.
But the sad truth is that women are pressured by society to shop because they’re held to higher standards than men regarding appearance. The fashion industry aims their advertising mostly at women, in an effort to create insecurities. And –amazingly– in Trump’s America it’s still hard to be taken seriously when you’re a young woman getting started in the business world …especially if you aren’t well dressed. When it comes to appearance, women are expected to be on top of their game at all times, while men are allowed to simply slide by. #SoNotFair
The Bottom Line
I don’t feel any shame about being bad at “women’s work,” and I’m not convinced there’s any reason I should be. Women have a lot more opportunities these days, but that’s not to say you’re any less of a modern woman if you fit this “traditional” mold. Feminism is about choice.
The fact of the matter is, women have other things to do in life besides cooking, cleaning, and giving birth. As times have changed, so has what’s expected of women. These days, women are able to juggle all of that and more while still being happy. Some are stuck in the past, but progressive women all over the world are changing how women are perceived and refuse to be held to old-timey standards.
Men and Women have the decision to say who does a majority of the housework, now if the woman and man both decide on how their situation will then so be it, to each his own. Now the situation can be turned if one or another decides it is only fair that one specific gender plays a specific role as in only the women doing the housework, now with that I completely disagree. Anyone, no matter male or female can be the person they choose and societal pressuring for a woman to do all the housework is stereotypical and wrong.
Women still shoulder the overwhelming burden of household tasks, particularly after they have had children. When they earn more, their bargaining power with their partner’s increases, so closing the gender pay gap would help.
Brace yourself for the most maritally divisive piece of news you’ll hear all week: married women do more housework than their husbands.
As a woman, I do not mind doing the stereotypical female stuff like cooking, dishes, and laundry, etc, because my man does the stereotypical male stuff like fixing with his tools, shoveling the driveway, mowing the lawn, changing the oil or a tire, etc. I think the bottom line is that if it needs to get done and you have the time while your spouse is busy elsewhere, just do it regardless of gender. It works out pretty evenly for us. I like to cook and entertain, however, to be perfectly honest I am getting older and tired. A lot of work goes into a special occasion meal, say Christmas, and my family has grown to expect it while the teenagers/young adults who don’t lend a helping hand make me mad. Teach your children manners to offer to help, at least with the dishes afterwards regardless of gender.
Years and years for feminism, yet women still do all the housework.
Women deserve to have a career and a life too. In the modern day, women are proving to be smart independent people and not just housewives and child bearers. If both a man and a woman work then they should have to share the household responsibilities then. Women shouldn’t be the only parent looking after the children either because if the father is still around he should have to help with caring for the children.
A relationship is not skewed in one direction, it’s a 50/50 and people should recognize that when getting into something like marriage or engagement. You pull your weight and your significant other pulls theirs. Not to say that there wouldn’t be times where one would have to pull more than the other, but generally speaking, men and women are int he same boat and deserve to work together instead of separating housework and jobs with gender stereotypes and roles.
I believe in Gender Equality. Men and women should get equal pay, equal opportunities, equal household chores. I help my wife with household chores and I know it’s the right thing to do. More men should compromise and start helping with household chores. Women shouldn’t have to do all the work at home.
I like to do certain things and my wife likes to do certain things. If you and your wife are arguing about who does what around the house; you need to just get a divorce and save each other heartache. I do most of the outside stuff, but if I needed help I would just ask my wife and of course, she would help. I do all the vacuuming inside because my wife hates vacuuming. Point being, if you are arguing about cleaning the house, you have much bigger problems than house cleaning!
The domestic division of labor is very unfair and needs to change! Men have to stop and lower their expectation towards women, Mothers are usually too busy taking care of the children and balancing work as today most women go to work, therefore I believe men should help women at home with housework such as cleaning, cooking, and simples chores like washing the dishes.